Robin's Friendly Observations

Posted on Mon Mar 28th, 2016 @ 10:21am by Captain Li Hawke & Lieutenant Commander Robin Swift M.D., PhD

Mission: Further Challenges
Location: Counselor Swift's Office

* Counselor Swift’s Office *

Li entered the office and smiled immediately upon seeing Drusilla.

“Hi, Dru, how are you?” Li stopped by the desk. “I know I’m a few minutes early.”

“I’m doing well,” Dru replied, her ever-present smile still on her face. Robin’s door was still closed so she wasn’t going to send her on in. “I’m sure he’ll be ready in a few moments.” She bit her tongue at mentioning anything about Sakkath, sure that everyone had already apologized and offered condolences more than Li probably wanted to hear.

“It’s okay Dru. Really. I appreciate the sentiment. I know he was cared for by many and I don’t mind hearing it now, though the first few days….” Li shrugged lightly. “I was in avoid mode as you two likely knew.”

“Sorry,” Dru said softly. “I forgot about…” She motioned to her head and to Li, referring to Li’s gift as a Betazoid. Desperately wanting to think of anything else to say to change the subject, she finally decided against it and kept her mouth shut. Her mind, however, was probably wide open for Li and she couldn’t help that.

Robin’s door opened, breaking the silence. “Captain,” he said, stepping into the waiting room. “Glad you could make it. Ready to come in?”

“Glad I could make it without having to be hunted down as Earl had to do?” She smiled at Robin as she passed into his office. “I was politely told I was driving him to distraction.”

Robin laughed and closed the door behind them. “Earl likes things in order, so his reaction is no surprise.” She sat and he stood a moment. “Something to drink?”

“No I’m fine.” Li sat down and leaned back in her chair. “First, I’d like to say thank you, Robin. You’ve been patient and didn’t chase me down. It was a weird time for me all around and….I suppose we have some catching up to do.”

“It would have only exacerbated the issue if I’d have you escorted here,” he replied, sitting to her right. “I want you willing to talk freely to me, not upset that I’ve forced you here. That’s no way to do my job, I don’t think--quite the opposite, actually.”

“Things have been so crazy lately that I’ve missed my last couple of monthly visits too,” she admitted. “Where do you want to start? You are aware I’ve seen Sakkath’s father?”

“No, I wasn’t aware of that. How did that go?”

“It was good to see him again,” Li began. “He came to help and it’s good that he did. He ended up having to fix Darwin too.” She briefly described the circumstances that had led to the unexpected connection with Darwin and Sokar’s assistance in setting the security officer back to rights.”Darwin got a little more than he bargained for, but I think he’ll be alright.”

“Never let it be said that a relationship--any relationship, that is, with a Betazoid is easy.” Robin smiled. “I’m glad he was able to get things straightened out for you. So, how are you doing otherwise?”

“Settling finally. Sokar has said that while it was admirable that I ….that I changed to suit my life with Sakkath, that it couldn’t continue, that it wasn’t natural for me. You know the whole Betazoid thing. He unlocked a lot I had hidden away and it will take some time to get used to being...me again. Whatever that is.” She studied Robin closely for a moment. “Do you think I changed?”

“Everyone changes, to a certain extent, when they get into a committed relationship,” Robin replied diplomatically. “Did I see a change? Here and there, but it was still you. However, our circles don’t run as tightly as, say, you and the Admiral or Oz. They would have noticed it more than I would have.”

Li nodded. “Looking back, I can see that I’d had less and less time for the people I am close to and I intend to fix that. I need to because I miss them. That almost sounds as if I were being prevented from seeing them and that isn’t it at all, it’s just that life with a Vulcan becomes such a private thing that others get edged out somehow.”

“It’s the life you chose, Li. I don’t think any of your true friends hold that against you. Love does things to people and sometimes it’s not always something others like, but it works for you.” He shrugged. “You just have to go with it and trust that your friends will understand.”

“That brings up something else that’s a little complicated.” She paused as she considered how best to explain the situation, but then the words just tumbled out. “You remember Rhys of course?”

“I do,” he said with a nod.

“His brother has been assigned here - Maxym. He’s taking over for the previous Betazoid ambassador and will be here for the foreseeable future.” She looked past Robin and out the portal as Max’s appearance at her quarters replayed in her thoughts. “He showed at my door the night I got back from Archadia. At my father’s request, actually.”

“Mmm-hmm. And how did that meeting go?”

“It was a shock,” she answered. “Which is what Dad intended I think, something to shock me out of my haze and back to the real world. My first thought was that it was Rhys and it wasn’t until after I had a phaser pointed at his head that he convinced me to read him, see who he really was. He and Rhys always did look startlingly alike. So I didn’t shoot him, which is a good thing. Things got complicated after that.”

“I’m relieved that you didn’t shoot him, a little less relieved that you weren’t immediately able to sense that he wasn’t Rhys, however. But shelving that, complicated how? What happened?”

“We began to talk and he sort of...nudged me to open up. He could see I’d been running as he put it and he was right. He’s known me since we were kids and could see the signs. It continued till he got what he wanted….I let it all out and it was almost too much for him mentally, but he got through it. He was right too. After that I sat down and finally took a look at what is really happening, just before I fell asleep on him.” Li smiled finally.

Robin nodded. When she had mentioned it being complicated, he was worried that something had happened between the two. “That doesn’t sound too bad, actually. Being able to open up to someone can be very healthy.”

“It can, especially someone who knows me well and understands me.” She paused and studied Robin a moment, then nodded. “Something did. Sort of.”

“Something did what?” he asked, then realized what she meant. “Ah. Care to discuss it, or is that for a later time?”

“Well, nothing...intimate,” she confessed. “But our past came up, as did Rhys. Back when we were growing up, everything was about Rhys, because of the marriage arrangement. Max was the one who had hopes, if you get my drift, but was remarkably good at hiding it because of the way things were. The funny thing is that I preferred him to Rhys. I think the only one who knew the whole story was Rhys himself, who went to some lengths to keep distance between Max and me. Things almost came out when I joined the Berkeley crew. A month or so before that I was home and I mentioned to Max then that I was going to put off the wedding. Before I could say more or he could, Rhys appeared and rather skillfully ended the conversation. Not long after I was on the Berkeley and away from both. You know the story after that.”

“I do.” He shifted in his chair. “So, I guess this brings up the question of how having the Ambassador here will affect you? Long-time friends, I get, but you said you preferred him over his brother. Is there the possibility of rekindling an old flame?”

Li considered the question and finally nodded. “Yes. I mean, not immediately, obviously. I still have a lot to deal with and as he put it, a ‘me’ to figure out again, now that I am a me and not a we, if that makes sense. He wants things to happen for the right reasons, not because some part of me doesn’t want to be alone. I know, looking at this from an outside point of view, it might seem weird too, given what all happened with Rhys.”

“Nothing is weird when it comes to being happy or in love, at least that’s what I think about the subject. I would, however, advise caution on proceeding too quickly on anything.”

“I agree.” She sat silent, thinking about Max. “How do I know when it is alright, Robin? I mean, how long is enough time to be sure I want it for the right reasons? I guess I need to know...would I even know if I was just seeking someone to be there? And how soon is too soon, considering I just lost my husband? If I have dinner with him...or someone else, are people going to think I’m awful since Sakkath is barely gone?”

“Look, Li, to be honest? Who gives a damn what anyone else thinks? You’re going to go out with people to eat and interact, it’s something people do. And if those people think the wrong thing about it, so what? They’re misinformed and, more importantly, it’s none of their business.” He exhaled sharply. “I’m sorry. None of that is what I should have said. I guess I was speaking more as your friend than your shrink.” With a frown he added, “I’ll have to consult with Raj. If I can’t be more professional, I may have to transfer your case to someone else.”

“No,” she said immediately. “Nothing against Raj, but you and I go way back. Sometimes, it’s precisely in these ‘friendly’ observations that I find the most help.” She reached out to take his hand in hers. “I’d like you to meet Max. Maybe not here in the office but otherwise.” She shrugged them. “Or here. He may have some questions of his own in all this.”

“I’m certainly open to either option,” he replied, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “Think it over and let me know. But with two of your kind being there, I may look into some neural block to keep the both of you from snooping.” He winked.

“I normally don’t, you know that.” She smiled back at him. “Well, except for your wondering if something happened with Max. That just leaped out at me, I couldn’t help it.”

He couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s not you I’m concerned about. And while I’m not usually suspicious of new people, I find that to be a little less so when it comes to meeting a new Betazoid.” He shrugged. “I’m sorry, it’s a horrible thing to think or even say, but I don’t know them like I know you. Hell, you could wander freely through my mind and I wouldn’t care at all, and your rank and position certainly help that, but someone new shouldn’t be able to pick my mind at will and potentially find confidential patient information. My personal life being known doesn’t bother me, but I have to protect my patients.”

“That’s fair,” she agreed. “He wouldn’t mind a block I don’t think, which would keep him from reading you, at least till you are comfortable. Assuming he decides to visit professionally that is. He’s a good man, Robin, unlike his brother. We were both just too caught up in tradition back then. After that, life intervened and suddenly, here we are years later.”

“Well, in that case, maybe you could just speak to him about ensuring he keeps his mind to himself and I’ll forgo any meds to block him. I don’t want to get off to a bad start, so that might be the best course of action.”

“Want some more complications?” Li held up her hand to stop his questions as she continued. “Nothing too serious, I promise, but to be considered.”

He squinted his eyes at her and asked, “Pregnant?”

Li’s eyes widened and her mouth fell open. “Pregnant? Oh, goodness no! What brought that up?”

“Just a wild guess. You are usually full of surprises, so I took a shot.” He laughed. “What are the other complications?”

“The subject had come up but that’s beside the point now,” she admitted. “I don’t think now is a good time for that. Well, I mean now before Sakkath died. Now now definitely isn’t. I’m talking, though, about our families. You know my mother…..”

He cocked his head. “Yes...I know your mother. But you had more to say, I assume?”

“While she was nuts over what Rhys pulled, she’d like nothing better than to see the two families merged as originally planned. Dad’s not so big on the whole family merger thing, but he always loved the boys like they were his own kids. Max’s parents will be happy too. They were devastated over what Rhys did. I guess the real complication is the head of that family, Menna. She’s here, by the way. I think she would grab Max and I right now and drive us to the ceremony if she could manage it.”

Robin sucked in through his clenched teeth and made a pained look. “Oh, wow. Geez. That’s...yeah, that’s a bit of a complication. How are you going to keep all of that at bay?”

“Dad and Max’s parents will be fine. My mother? Well, let’s just say I’m not being too forthcoming about Max yet. He and I still don’t know where this will end up so best to keep my mouth shut. Since she’s not here, that will be somewhat possible. As for Menna, that will be trickier. We were always close but I’m doing my best not to feel like the prize to be won who will continue the family line, you know?”

Robin couldn’t help but laugh. “Like anyone is going to make you do anything you don’t want to!”

“Well yes, there is that.” She laughed with him, thinking about Menna and her listening in. “Menna has very definite ideas about things, especially her granddaughter - Ensign Madhava. The whole part-Orion thing has her in a real twist.”

Glancing at the chronometer, Robin noticed the time. “Looks like anything more--well, anything official, will have to wait until next session. But I’d be more than happy to talk more, off the record, if you’d like.”

“Here or say..lunch?” Li asked.

“Pssh. Away from here,” he said with a dismissive wave toward his office. “Off the record, my dear, means no office.”

“Good. Let’s go then.” Li stood and smoothed out her skirt. “ Since it’s off the record, I want to hear about Niall.” She moved over to open the doors.

“We may need to schedule lunch and dinner, then,” he replied as they headed out into the corridor.


-----------------------------
Lt. Cmdr. Robin Swift
Helping a Friend

Captain Li Hawke
Getting Some Much-Needed Perspective