Voices Carry

Posted on Mon Feb 11th, 2013 @ 5:19pm by Lieutenant Nick Marcinko & Lieutenant Commander Leto

Mission: The Struggle Within
Location: Archadia -- Imara (Leto's) residence
Timeline: Current

Nick stormed off from the courtyard, leaving Leto and Patrick standing at the statue. The only thing he could think of was getting the hell away from there. From her.

The doors closed on his shuttle and he lifted off, heading back to 900. Upon his return he apparently took everyone by surprise. There were no hard shoulders, knocking people off balance or completely over. There were no quick jabs at how ignorant someone was, how they could go fuck themselves, where to stick it…nothing. Several people stopped and stared as he walked quietly away from the shuttle, across the flight deck and out the main doors. They weren’t used to a sullen and quiet Master Chief Marcinko and they were concerned. Had someone died? Was there some impending tragedy about to strike the base that he had just found out about?

He ignored the stares and open-mouthed gawks as he walked through the base. He’d intended to go back to his quarters but he found himself everywhere but there. Before long he finally stopped for a drink and noticed that it had been more than four hours since he’d returned to the base. Oddly enough, the entire time he’d been walking around his mind was on the one person he’d intended to forget about. Most of the thoughts made him want to retch—twice he started to throw up in his mouth a bit. But to beat it all, his only thought was to get back to Leto.

He’d finally gone to his quarters but only long enough to change and grab a few tools. He was now draped all in black to help him slink around the planet’s surface undetected. To help him spy on Leto undetected, that is.

* * *

Once Patrick was gone, and Nick out of sight, Leto stood looking at the statue. It was evening and the square was sparsely populated now as most were off eating dinner. Much to the surprise of the few that remained, the Prime Minister herself appeared in the square and approached Leto. When a hand settled on her arm, surprising her from her thoughts, she jumped.

“Oh. Good evening, Prime Minister.”

“Imara.” Aegina smiled to her. “I was just out for my usual evening walk. I’m sorry things happened as they did for you. Losing someone you love is tragic and takes time. If there’s anything I can do for you, I want you to promise to call. Veist may have turned on me at the end but he served me well for a long time. He was like family and that makes you family now as well. Perhaps, in some small way, I can help make up for your loss and what he did. I will say, however, that from what I saw, I think he did truly love you. Just some things overshadowed it.”

Leto nodded slowly. “Thank you, Prime Minister.”

Aegina wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Please, call me Aegina. I am looking forward to dinner tomorrow night.”

“Very well, Aegina. I am as as well. For now, though, I’m exhausted. I want to get home. Tomorrow, I’ll worry about Zoudin’s things.”

“Take care.” Aegina watched as Leto moved away and crossed the square. So far so good.

It wasn’t until Leto was out of sight of Aegina that she really began to breathe normally, and only after she was sure she wasn’t being followed. She took a leisurely route home, walking slow, but finally she arrived at the house she called ‘hers’. Once the front door was locked, and she’d shed her shoes, she passed through the house into the garden behind it, sinking her toes into the grass and enjoying the warm night air.

Nick crouched by a tree stump and some overgrown grass and watched Leto. He was unnerved by how at ease she seemed in her role as Imara, especially now that she was back to herself and no longer under hypnosis. He could see her just fine from where he was but he felt the need to get closer. Moving silently across the back yard he was in he lost sight of her momentarily as a fence blocked his view. But butting up against Leto’s place and the backyard he was in was a very large and very leafy tree. It was right at the fenceline and would provide good cover. He scaled it quickly and settled on a thick branch well into the tree and out of her view.

She stood, enjoying the breeze as it blew through her hair. Finally, she settled on a stone bench by one of the flower beds with a sigh. The one thing she’d said to Aegina that wasn’t a lie was that she was exhausted. SHe was also hungry, she realized, but that would have to wait. She needed to get past the remains of Zoudin Veist in her head. She’d been deep undercover before but it had never affected her this profoundly. What annoyed her was that the man she did love had such a hard time with her, and the one she’d been assigned had no such inhibitions. She believed the Prime MInister’s opinion of Zoudin’s feelings too. Yet one more thing to get past somehow. And now Nick was...god knew where in a mood that she couldn’t even touch.

“Dammit,”she muttered.

His head cocked when she spoke. Sometimes he wished he had been born with mind-reading skills. Of course, she was probably thinking of him. He was about the only person that could annoy her so completely. She had walked away from where she’d stood forcing him to switch positions in the tree. When he did he misjudged the distance to another branch and snapped a small twig. He froze.

Leto’s head snapped up instantly. Too many years in the field told her that someone was either in a tree or stepped on a twig. Small animals didn’t snap twigs like that and there were no large animals in town, other than people. She sat silent, listening.

It was obvious that he’d given himself away. He saw her scanning the area but even looking up into the tree wouldn’t reveal his position. It would only be a few moments before she actually found him, however, so he decided the only thing to do was to reveal himself. Otherwise she may think that Aegina was still after her, and he couldn’t do that to Leto, no matter how he felt about her now.

“Guess I shoulda’ picked a bigger branch,” he said quietly.

“Or knocked on the front door,” Leto answered. There was a sharp edge to her voice. “Get your ass down here and explain yourself.” While the words were strong, her tone wasn’t. She didn’t want her voice to carry.

“You think I should explain myself?” he asked, still in the tree. “Maybe you should take your own damn advice.”

“I got what we were after didn’t I?”

“Yeah, you got it, alright.” And he wasn’t referring to the evidence.

“This will change everything and finally end this mess.” She sighed aloud. “Get down here.”

“You’re goddamn right it’s changed everything,” he barked, a little louder than he should have. He finally dropped from the tree and stood in the corner of the yard, at the base of the tree. He had no desire to get closer to her. “And you don’t appear to give two shits about it.”

Leto paused as she heard footsteps drawing close. When she spoke, she raised her voice a little. “Thank you for coming, Master Chief Marcinko. Your sympathy is much appreciated. May I offer you something to drink inside?”

He gawked at her. “Seriously? You’re just gonna’ belt out my name? Does the term ‘infiltration specialist’ mean anything to you?” He huffed, shook his head and brushed past her and into the house.

Once they were inside, she closed the doors behind them. “No one will think anything of one of my rescuers coming to check on me. You know as well as I do that sometimes the best place to hide is right out in the open.” She moved over to the replicator and ordered two drinks, both Nick’s favorite. She passed one to him, then sat down.

Taking the glass he looked at the liquid inside, swirled it once and put it down on the table. He wasn’t in the mood to drink. Now that he was face to face with her he wanted to leave. He wanted to yell. He wanted to scream and curse and bitch and moan. He didn’t want a drink.

Instead, he sat silently and glowered at Leto.

“So why are you here? To scream and yell? Or rub my face in it? To slice me to ribbons for hurting you so badly because you are the only one in pain here?” Her eyes held his, never wavering. “I can’t think that it’s to see if maybe I’m alright in all this mess, as much as I want to believe it is. Otherwise, why would you hide in a tree?”

His original response was something akin to “I don’t want to hear what all your face was rubbed in!”, but he thought better of it. Sexual innuendos weren’t exactly where he wanted to go, even though it was almost all he could think of. “How, exactly, are you in pain? Because your ‘mate’,” he said with air quotes, “died? You want me to make sure that you’re okay after the death of your lover? Is that what you want? Oh, please forgive me for thinking that I was the victim here, seeing as MY mate decided to go get hitched with enemy number one and let him plow her field all night. Fuck, what was I thinking!?”

“NO! Because I was in a very dangerous place, Nick. If he’d discovered my reports, I’d be dead! And then I had to lie my ass off to cover what happened with the Prime Minister or all three of us would vanish...or have some tragic accident. Or perhaps blow my cover yet again.” She paused to take a deep breath. “And on top of it all? You’re not having to sit here and see the expression in your eyes.”

“Gotcha,” he said. “You’re in pain because you’re in a dangerous place, could have been found out and had to lie to the Prime Minister.” He faked shock. “Oh! You mean, you’re doing the same job you’ve been doing for years!” With a palm to his own forehead he stood and threw the glass. “Poor, poor you, Leto! I can’t believe I was so fucking insensitive to think that you wouldn’t feel some pain for doing this job that you apparently love more than me! You know, me? The man who offered to give up everything for you!? God, I am such a fucking cad. I should be so ashamed of myself.”

Leto’s fair skin went paler as she stared back at him. “Maybe if you came in here being reasonable, we might have started there. Instead, your usual sarcasm and bellowing put me on the defensive. Maybe you should come back when you can be. Reasonable that is.”

“Reasonable...like when you were being reasonable when you summarily disregarded my objections to this particular mission without even hanging out to listen?” He walked to the door. “You want to shit all over us and then you point the finger at me because I’m not being reasonable?” He nodded and laughed. “Fine, Leto. I can see that you honestly don’t care about us. The job is more important than me, I get it.”

Leto jumped for a small panel in the wall and slammed her hand against it. At the door, Nick heard the distinct sound of a lock slamming home. “Don’t you dare put words in my mouth or presume to know what I do and don’t care about!”

He instinctively jerked on the door but it was locked pretty damn good. The door didn’t even wiggle, not even a bit. Looking down he sighed. He had hoped to get away from her but now he was stuck and she didn’t appear to be willing to budge on her position. Resigning himself to not jumping out through a window to escape he sat back down in the chair he had been in.

“Fine, Leto,” he said. “Please explain to me how it was much more important that you allow some strange man to explore and violate your body, whether it was you in there or not,” he said as he tapped his head. “And how my reservations about it, and willingness to drop everything I have and am, just for you, didn’t mean a thing.” He sat back and crossed one leg over another. “Go ahead. I’m listening.”

He was actually rather calm and his face didn’t belie that fact.

“That part wasn’t. But Nick you know as well as I do that too much was riding on this to let it go. Kh’ali now has what she needs to put the PM right where she wants her and finally put an end to this and doing so was a huge thing. Honestly didn’t expect him to really fall for me. Attract his attention? Sure. And maybe he’d dally for a bit, spill some info and we’d be done. How was I supposed to know he’d drug me and carry me off? Or that some hunter would show up to kill us? Aegina sent her by the way. And by that time, there was no way out.” Leto sat back down, resting her arms on her knees. “It had nothing to do with not caring for you. Do you think I feel great about all this?”

“Okay, what does this,” he said pointing to her and himself, “have to do with that other shit? I don’t give two fucks about the hunter, him drugging you and carrying you off or Aegina. We could have had any number of intelligence operators do what you did. You only did it because you wanted to, and you knew that it could happen. We had all kinds of options, but you had to make it all about you, Nick’s feelings be damned! That other shit? Getting drugged and attacked? That’s part of the job. Spreading your legs for the bad guy? That’s not. I warned you, I begged you, you ignored me. So tell me why you wouldn’t feel bad about it? Is it guilt because of that big ol’ I TOLD YOU SO is coming soon? Because you know that someone else could have done this, and you could have spared my feelings, but deep down you didn’t give a shit?”

Leto’s eyes blazed at him. “You didn’t care that he drugged me and ran off? I’m damn lucky that you and Patrick were in flight or I’d be gone. GONE, Nick! It may be part of the job but there was never a time when you were in danger that I didn’t worry. And don’t forget that you’ve had to take one for the team too while we’ve been in the field. Is this about the fact that it happened or your fear that I cared for the guy? Nothing else we’ve tried had gotten us in this far or revealed this much, and don’t you dare twist those words around on me.” She stopped, her breathing rapid, her face flushed. Then she did something he’d never, ever seen her do. She began to cry.

“No, I didn’t care that he had drugged you and ran off with you. Do you know why? For starters, because I was your backup. Secondly, I know that you can take care of yourself. I don’t worry about you in those sorts of situations. And why is it that you keep defending your position in this? Anyone could have approached him. Hell, it was even harder to have you do it because we had to wipe your damn memory! And not just the ‘Hey, I’m from Starfleet’ bit, but the part about seeing him before, knowing who he was--everything! We could have gotten anyone to spread their legs for Zoudin Veist, to become his fucking mate! Why the hell did it have to be you!?”

By the time he was done his voice was booming. He was certain that any neighbors would have heard him, but he didn’t care. As far as he was concerned, his relationship was ruined and the woman that ruined it couldn’t see why.

“Do you think I enjoyed it? Is that what this is about? Because no, I didn’t! I did what had to be done, that’s all. But I’m me, not you, so my position is one I have to think of. I have to live with what happened and how it makes you feel, and the possibility that you won’t be able to forgive.” Leto pressed her hands to her eyes, then covered her face, leaning over to rest it against her knees.

“I gave you a fucking out, Leto! Why was it so important that the high and mighty Leto take this role? You didn’t seem to worry about how it would make me feel then! Why is it such a problem now?” He huffed and sat back in the chair. He didn’t like seeing her cry but he wasn’t going to stop it. Hell, maybe she was actually feeling some sort of pain from her actions. It would serve her right...but he still didn’t like it.

“You realize,” he continued, “that I was literally going to give up everything for you. Whatever I had to do to keep you from doing this. This leopard was going to change his spots, just for you, Leto...but you threw it in my face for duty, for honor, for whatever-the-hell-else you want to call it. And look where that duty and honor got us,” he said, raising his arms up, his hands gesturing to their surroundings. “Nowhere near where I would like to be, that’s for sure. All in the name of information that another equally qualified intelligence operative could have obtained from him. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if you were still in love with him. I know it wasn’t you, it was Imara, but I also know how that mind wipe thing works. There’s some cross-interference. I know you remember things from when you were Imara.”

“Some.” Her voice was muffled. “But I am not in love with him. Only you.”

“I can tell,” he said, “by the way you ran right off to his arms and away from me. Thanks for that, by the way. If you wanted to punish me for something, make me feel emasculated or like some kind of cuckold, you’ve succeeded.” Looking around the room, and now wishing he still had that drink, he asked, “So, what now? Did this conversation go as planned? If so, what’s the next move on this job that you were so ‘hot and bothered’ to get into?”

As much as he wanted to keep throwing dirt on her, he decided it was best to just move on. She hurt him very badly, but he still had feelings for her. He’d probably never touch her again but that was something to worry about later. For now, they had a job to finish.

“Are you finished slicing me to ribbons? Do you feel better now?” She reached for her own drink finally and took a sip, then wiped her eyes.

“No, and no,” he said plainly. “But since you’re never going to admit that you made a huge fucking mistake, this conversation is pointless. So what’s your next move, slick? I guess we still have to get to the Queen.”

“I did say it, you were too busy yelling to hear. I was wrong. Since you’ve never been wrong ever, have some patience with those of us who can be.” Leto let out a tired breath. “I think he had some evidence hidden away, in case things went bad. We didn’t have time to get it before we left so I think it’s still in that house somewhere.”

He bit his tongue. He’d been wrong plenty of times and was never afraid to say it. Hell, he’d boasted about his fuck-ups. But this wasn’t something simple they were playing at. She was holding his heart in her hands, but she was squeezing the shit out of it.

“So go get it,” he said.

“Do you want to come? Since you have my back and all that.” Her voice sounded far too tired.

“Fine. Let’s get it overwith,” he said as he stood and waited for her to come with him. “You’ll have to let me out of the prison, by the way.”

She moved over to unlock the door, then gave him the address. “Better that you get there unseen. No one will question my going there. The back door is unlocked.”

He took the information and opened the door. Pausing, he stood there as if he was going to say more but everything that needed to be said had been. Funny--he thought he’d feel better after getting it all off of his chest. As he closed the door behind him he realized that he didn’t.


***************

Lt.(lg) Leto
Lost In The Aftermath

MCPO Nick Marcinko
Lost in Love