The Interview
Posted on Mon Oct 8th, 2012 @ 2:59pm by Commander Oralia Zeferino & Ignatius Reilly & Lieutenant Commander Kh'ali
Mission: Sections of the Delta Quadrant
Oralia’s Quarters
Coming home from having been dealing with various issues all day, Oralia was quick to pull off her boots and start undressing as she wandered through the living area into her bedroom. Tossing her tunic and kicking her pants towards the recycler, she stopped stock still. “Iggy!”, she shouted, staring at what she found on her bed.
Yes, Oralia?, came Iggy’s oh-so-calm response. Oh, yes, my lunch... So sorry, I meant to gather those and put them in the recycler, as you showed me, but... well... I did not.
Uncertain just where Iggy was speaking to her from, Oralia looked around the bedroom and then the bathroom, where she nearly jumped out of her skin as strands of spider silk clung to her face and hair - they were hanging from the ceiling of the bathroom. “What...!? What have you been doing?”
Nothing, really. I ate then I had water from the shower then I napped on your bed. What have you been doing?
“Ugh! Where are you?” Oralia had grabbed a towel and was reaching up to scrub the strands from the ceiling. For the moment, the white strands clinging to her dark hair went ignored.
I am above you, Iggy replied.
Oralia went back to the bedroom and looked at the ceiling. Beyond a few stray silk strands hanging down, there was nothing there. “Above me? In a vent shaft or crawl space?”
Indeed. I am claiming it as my room, my space. It is a touch cramped and breezy, but a good coating of silk should help with the breeze.
“Iggy! You can’t live in the vent shaft!” The human argued, but was cut short by a beep from her computer console. She glanced about for her robe and, finding it, was disgusted to see that one of Iggy’s bolus clung to it. Pulling the discarded carcass off the fabric, she recycled the bolus, then had a moment’s hesitation and recycled the robe as well. To cover her nudity, she grabbed a shirt and, donning it, realized it was Jackson’s. His smell enveloped her and she smiled, recalling.... The beep came again and she moved to answer the comm.
Her concern over being covered was wasted: the comm was simply a message, sent by Kh’ali’s office, setting a day and time for an interview with the sentience applicant and subject. Oralia grinned, “Iggy! We have an interview to see about getting you named your own species!”
I am already my own species.
In the area just outside Kh’ali’s office, Ignatius J. Reilly fidgeted fussily, brushing her legs with her pedipalps and scrubbing her head with her legs. When she did finally stand still, she asked Oralia, How do I look?
Looking down at the spider that, standing normally came just to mid-calf on her but whom, when standing on her back legs in a defensive pose (or, more likely, in a pose asking to be picked up), could come up to her knee, Oralia nearly laughed. “You look... fine... you know, for a very large spider.” Which really meant: you look goddamned scary to the casual observer.
No lint? My vest is straight? Iggy was again moving, her legs and pedipalps busy grooming herself.
“You look fine, Iggy, stop worrying and stop fidgeting so much. You’re makin’ me nervous,” Oralia told her.
One of the office doors opened and Quentin stepped out. “Hello Commander Zeferino, Iggy. How are you?” The question was directed to Iggy, who was still fidgety.
Stopping her fidgeting, Iggy looked up at the tall biped (to Iggy, though, everyone was tall, even children) and answered, I am well, thank you.
“She’s nervous, Lieutenant Dobry. Is Kh’ali ready for us?” Oralia asked.
“She is, yes. Just through those center doors.” He smiled at Oz, then looked down at Iggy. “And don’t worry. It’s just Kh’ali, okay?”
Klingons eat live worms; I have a feeling they eat spiders, too, Iggy whispered in their heads but walked forward with Oralia...
...who was laughing. “Iggs, I promise I won’t let Kh’ali eat you. C’mon, kiddo.” She held the doors open for Iggy, who rushed forward, and then followed her into the room beyond. “Commander Kh’ali, let me introduce Ignatius J. Reilly --”
Zeferino, Iggy added Oralia’s last name to hers.
“Zeferino,” Oz smiled.
Kh’ali looked up from the padds before her as she sat behind her desk and smiled. “Welcome, Ignatius J. Reilly Zeferino. Come in and sit down, please. How are you Oz? Everything settling back down after our unexpected vacation?”
“Yeah, things are normalizing,” Oz nodded and stooped to pick up Iggy. “Is your desk okay for her to sit on?”
“Certainly. I’m afraid I don’t have any arachnid-friendly seats just yet.” Kh’ali moved several padds aside to make room for the large spider. It occurred to her that large was something of an understatement as she looked back at Iggy. Once she was settled Kh’ali lifted the closest pad. “Computer, begin recording.” There was a soft beep then she addressed Iggy. “Now then Iggy, I have Oz’s original application with the basic information. I take it you want Zeferino added?”
Before Iggy answered, she paused for a long moment then shifted slightly to look at Oralia. Recording? It cannot record me, can it?, she asked both women.
“No but I’ll be repeating the answers so it can add them in with the application,” Kh’ali answered.
Oh, I see. Yes, I would like Zeferino added, Iggy answered.
“Noted. We’ll add Zeferino.” She scanned the padd before her, reading over the information it contained. “Next I am required to inform you of several things.” She eyed Iggy over the padd. “First, this is a lengthy process. Besides the form submitted, and this interview, I’ll be talking to those who know you here on the station. In addition, Commander Leroy will have to do a complete analysis and cross reference it with all known life forms. In the case of those similar to others, such as in your case, he will be looking for what makes you unique. That can also be time-consuming, but trust me when I say he’ll do everything possible. If that hurdle is passed, then it goes to Starfleet to determine. Given our remote location, Admiral Hawke will be the judge in this case.”
What if nothing makes me unique? Leave it to the talking arachnid to worry. Oralia smiled but stayed quiet.
Kh’ali raised an eyebrow at her. “Did you really just ask that question Iggy? So you know any other talking spiders of your kingdom, phylum, class, order or genus?”
I do not know any other spiders, Commander Kh’ali. Do you?
“Out this way, no, but almost every planet we know of has some sort of spider. Except this tiny planet beyond the expanse called Therelan V. The atmosphere and climate are particularly unsuited to those with exoskeletons. A most unusual place. But don’t worry, the Tholians are an arachnoid species as well, and they had no trouble.”
They had no trouble going to that planet?, Iggy sought clarification. I would think that finding another Goliath Tarantula this far out from Terra would be most difficult.
Now Oz spoke up, “Yeah, especially one that talks and tries to make her home in a vent shaft. Kh’ali, while this is pending, I’m going to petition Ops for new quarters. Something with a second bedroom.”
Kh’ali nodded. “I meant they had no trouble being seen as their own species. You have to think bigger Iggy. We’re not trying to prove you unique for this area, but unique as far as can be determined among all known life forms.” She repeated what Iggy had said so far for the computer. “Now you see why this is so in-depth. As for the larger quarters, I think that shouldn’t be any trouble. Especially with the upcoming wedding. Congratulations, Oz.”
Oz blinked. Wisely, she didn’t ask how Kh’ali knew; she simply nodded. “Ah... thank you,” then her smile broke out. It was the type of smile that couldn’t be denied and that spread to others easily.
Do Klingons eat their mates?
Kh’ali didn’t bother repeating that for the computer. “Umm...no, we don’t, not in that sense, and I’m certain they are glad of it.” A smile lit Kh’ali’s face. “Shall we carry on?”
Yes, please, Commander, Iggy answered. Oralia noticed that the spider was getting better and better about calling people by their names and ranks rather than type or gender.
“Very good. Now, most of the questions I am supposed to ask you Oz has covered, which saves us quite a bit of time. But I’m curious, Iggy. What is it like to be one of a kind? It’s been an interesting journey for you so far.”
At times frustrating and lonely. There is no one who sees the world the way I do. In my world, males are inferior creatures, needed for their sperm only and, perhaps, as a snack post-insemination. For a while, it felt as though no one wanted me around, but that was resolved. Learning to curse was interesting and fun; being laughed at in class because I do not have the same basic understanding as the others is not fun, Iggy said.
“People are always fearful of those they see as different. Often humour is a means of defending themselves.” Kh’ali laid the padd aside to look at Iggy. “The best advice I can give you is not to take it personally and accept that they simply do not understand.”
I will try to do that. Do you have more questions for me, Commander?
“I have none, this was mainly to give you an idea of how things will go and a warning that it will take time. I will begin speaking to those who know you now.” Kh’ali look from Iggy to Oz. “Either of you have questions for me?”
“I have none, Kh’ali. Iggy?”
Would you like to share a bowl of gagh sometime? I wager that beer and the worms would be tasty together, Iggy asked. She’d picked up the ‘I wager’ concept from Oralia.
Kh’ali wrinkled her nose. “You actually eat those things?”
Oz laughed. “She’s a spider. She loves it when her food fights back.”
Indeed, though I do not appreciate having my food actually try to eat me, Iggy added, referring to the one time Norval had given her a plate of gagh and several of the worms bit her.
“Just don’t stand downwind of her after a beer and cockroach meal,” Oralia warned. “Iggy, do you have any questions about the sentience process?”
No, not at this time. Commander, thank you for seeing me.
“My pleasure, Iggy, and I’d be happy to join you for dinner anytime. Upwind.” Kh’ali laughed and gave Oz a wink. “And Oz, since a wedding is coming, you know what that means, yes?”
Iggy turned towards Oralia; she caught that Oz was suddenly tense. What does it mean?
“Ah... dress shopping, I suppose,” unless she could convince Jackson to just skip the whole formal attire requirement. “Planning a wedding,” unless she could convince Jackson to just skip the whole big wedding idea. “And... but, I think Kh’ali is referring to a bachelorette party, the bride’s supposed last hurrah before being tied down,” Oralia smiled at that idea. A night out with the females in her circle would be good fun. Not good clean fun, but fun. “We’ll have to make plans for that, Kh’ali.”
“Excellent. Then I think we’re done here. Good luck Iggy, and I'll keep you updated as we progress.”
“Thanks, Kh’ali,” Oz said as she picked up her arachnid ward. “C’mon, let’s get you to class.”
Class, yes. And do I get to come along for this party? Iggy crawled up Oralia’s chest to her shoulder and hooked onto several locks of Oralia’s hair with her legs.
“Yeah, of course,” Oz smiled and waved at Kh’ali as she left the diplomat’s office.
___________________________
Lt.Commander Oralia Zeferino
Not Into Planning a Wedding
Ignatius J. Reilly Zeferino
Into Eating Gagh and Her Mate
Lt. Commander Kh’ali
NOT Into Eating Gagh Or Her Mate
