Home To Reality

Posted on Fri Dec 28th, 2012 @ 7:05am by Lieutenant Commander Kh'ali & Commander Patrick Leroy

Mission: The Struggle Within
Location: Kh'ali's Quarters

* * * Kh’ali’s Quarters * * *

Kh’ali stirred, eyes closed, enjoying the warmth of Patrick as he lay tangled with her in the bed. His arm was a comforting weight as it lay across her and for now, all was right with the universe. It was just them, hidden away, safe from all the strangeness that swirled around them now. A soft murmur escaped her, the words indistinct. Her curiosity was roused, however, but she let it go in favor of a few more moments of bliss.

A soft moan came from him and his hold on her tightened as if reacting to some unspecified threat in the dreamworld. Then his eyes opened. Rolling over to stare at the ceiling Patrick heaved a sigh. Softly but strong enough, in the silence of the room, to be picked up by Kh’ali. That and his moving finally dragged her back into the world again.

“Easy,” she murmured. Rolling over, she was now the one draped over Patrick, though she was careful. Already, there were a few bruises showing on his ribs. Tilting her head up, she brushed a kiss along his throat. “We need to leave all that outside our doors.”

“Doors,” Patrick sniffed in bitter irony “Everything’s haunting me now depends on the fact that no doors are safe anywhere here and those I’m trying to open won’t budge.” His fingers found their way to her neck under her hair where he stroked her gently. The scent, her scent, was more than enough to stir his desire again but all his worries fought over it.

“I’m afraid,” he told after a while continuing to caress her neck.

“Of what? Not succeeding? Or of the two words that are colliding never resolving?” She sighed aloud at his touch and smiled, despite the question. “You have some good minds assisting you. You’ll get there.”

“It’s just that, that I’m afraid of. That I’ll succeed and of what we’re going to find out then.” He sighed again kissing tenderly her cheek, his lips soft as they brushed along her cheekbone and up to her temple.

“What if you’re right? If in that moment... And only in that moment... We find out nothing but destruction and my other self...” The words coming out hardly from his mouth “Well... If my other self is just dead. What then? What will we say to the child and the other Aleksandra?”

Kh’ali grew still, that deep-seated fear returning. “I cannot answer that but at the risk of sounding harsh, that is her world. If things are as we suspect, they will need her to begin rebuilding. The child will eventually be told the truth. It’s a terrible situation but they cannot expect you to fill his shoes.”

“No, but it will take a full complement of counselors for that poor girl in that case. The mother is grown enough and aware of the risks we all undertake by being part of Starfleet...” He paused a moment thinking. “For the first time in my life I’m feeling strange. Until a few days ago I never had any doubt on what had to be done... The steps to be followed in life... If you ask me now...” His words trailing off.

“Meaning what exactly?” Kh’ali rubbed her eyes a moment. “This is why I was so concerned over this idea of trying to fool the child. Now it will be worse when she finds out the truth.”

“If we’re lucky there will be no need for that. The fact is I never felt very lucky...” Patrick turned to meet her eyes “You may deem it stupid but I’m feeling responsible. Every time I look in Faye’s eyes I see my own, the way she cocks her head looking at something picking her curiosity. I've also checked the pictures of when I was her age... Blood group, DNA, all is matching down to the last molecule. I can’t just treat her as another’s poor orphan for which I would in any case do my best to help from a very detached point of view.”

He breathed deeply passing his hands through his hair “It seems a mocking destiny is forcing me to cope with things, I now understand, I have always avoided choosing the easiest path... Career, duty... At the same time honorable objectives and incontrovertible excuses good enough to stop any unwanted hindrance to my own pre-set objectives. I never stopped a moment to think of all things unsaid... To the fact that any day lost is wasted and will never be returned...”

“And now, you want something you never thought you would, is that it?” She snuggled him in closer against her, brushing a kiss over his bare shoulder.

“I’m not sure” he smiled. “I’m wondering of something entirely different from what I’ve ever believed until now,” he replied hesitantly, as keeping focus on his thoughts proved always a great effort when he found himself the object of Kh’ali’s attentions.

“It must be a beautiful thing...” Patrick reprised taking hold of Kh’ali’s hand. “To see that sentiment... That was only passion at the start, expand... Taking care of it... Making it grow into real love... And protect it. Making it able, in the end, to stand the test of time...” the kiss on her wrist ended his words leaving a few instants of silence between them.

“It’s that desire that has kept all our species going for millennia,” she whispered back. “The attraction to another to make us complete, then wanting to experience the closest thing we can to immortality....though our children and their children.” She was quiet for a few moments, then whispered at his ear. “I love you....you know this. It’s your life, and mine. No one says you cannot have that if you want it.”

Dazed at Kh’ali’s open proffer Patrick stood speechless for a moment before responding. “It’s a kind of life I’ve strived to bury deep under the safe lid of material achievements for a long time,” he said lifting her chin to meet her eyes “But this I know.... From the day you stepped out from the transporter room on the Berkeley a part of me felt that there could have been none other than you to accompany me in this walk.”

Kh’ali nodded slowly. “I knew too. I tried to ignore it you know. Because of Aleksa but there was no staying away.” She smiled up at him finally. “Remember too, that material achievements will become empty after a while. But perhaps you know that already. Maybe that’s what keeps drawing us together. I brought out your wild side. It was there all along....” She ran her fingertip down his bare chest. “We’ll get through this and you’ll have what you want.”

“My wild side?” he chuckled “I never thought of having one,” he replied. “And is this what you want too?” he added turning suddenly serious encircling her in his arms.

Kh’ali took a little time to honestly consider the question. She wanted to be sure of her answer, sure that it was what she wanted, not a reaction to the current circumstances. She really couldn’t imagine life without Patrick. Her words to him regarding Aleksa from the other universe, and her own reaction when she’d seen her touch him gave her her answer. She may be half human, but her Klingon side had always ruled her passions and such a reaction wouldn’t be brought forth if she didn’t consider Patrick hers. And she had to admit now that seeing how he was with the young girl had touched her, reached deep down and hit that primal instinct her people were known for. She gave him another soft kiss and finally answered.

“Yes.”

**************
Lt. Commander Kh’ali
Facing The Big Questions


Lt. Commander Patrick Leroy
Posing Himself Big Questions